• Date: Mar 11, 2013

BUSTED!!!

Akpors - after his first time of leaving the village to the city went searching for a job and finally, he came to a big company to make inquires in respect of the advertisement which was being placed outside.

Akpors being so eager didnâ€t read the advertisement properly.
He just dashed into the company and began to ask for the MD.
Little did he know that a job of such magnitude requires someone who has been to different parts of the world.

On getting there, the MD decided to have a little interview with him.

MD: Hello young man, what can I do for you?
AKPORS: Good morning sir, I am Akpors Apororo and I came concerning the advertisement placed outside your company.

MD: I see. I hope you know that this job requires someone whoâ€s been to various parts of the world?
AKPORS (of course desperate): Yes sir, I know that.

MD: Good. So tell me, have you been to Germany?
AKPORS: Yes sir, I lived there for 7 years.

MD: Wow... thatâ€s good. How about the UK, have you been there before?
AKPORS: Yes Sir, I also lived there for 5 years.

MD: Interesting, how about the United States?
AKPORS: Iâ€ve been there also Sir, and I lived there for 6 years.

MD: Hmmm. Then you must know much about geography.
AKPORS: Yes sir Iâ€ve also been to geography before, and I lived there for 6 years

  • Date: Mar 11, 2013

Teacher: class write a composition about ur self

AKPORS wrote:
My name is Akpors Principle,

i am 18 yrs old and still
in d secondary school
bc of some reasons best
known to me and
d school management.
My girlfriend is Ekaite
who normally seat at d
back seat, although
she did not come to
school today because of
some reasons best known to her, bt i will find
out after school.

My parents ar 4feet
tall and dat has affected
my height and
perfomance. But still
am still popular and
am known everywere i go just like MTN

I like watching movies
like PIRATES, NURSES TOUCH, BASIC
INSTINCT,KARMA
SUTRA and other
movies like dis because
of some things inside.
But u will not understand

I like sleeping on d
floor because my fathers
armpit smells alot .

I usually sleep by 12pm
everynite because of
facebook, 2go and
others...i hav become
so popular their dat
people now ansa my name Akpors
on
fb and create
pages too
with my name

AKPORS. they even give me
series of aligations
and people belive them bc i usually do things like
dat bt not all.
...
am looking forward to
marry any
of these people
Alicia keys, Britney
spears, Niki minage
bt she is under consideration bc of her looks.

i like my self so much
bc i dont play with
my future.

From
AKPORS PRINCIPLE

  • Date: Mar 11, 2013

Akpors: Papa, how was i born?.
Papa akpors:Akpors my son, today you ask better question. Well, your Mother and i got together at yahoo. We set up a date via email and met in a cybercafe. Your Mother agreed to download data from my pen drive. So i put it in your Mother's USB port and just when i was about to transfer we realised that none of us had installed an ANTIVIRUS or FIREWALL. It was too late to hit Cancel and nine months later a Pop Up Window appeared and we had you

  • Date: Mar 11, 2013

After blocking Apkors from sending friends request to
ekaette..he wrote a letter to fb...
AM NOT JOKING

Dear Facebook,
its with great pleasure that i write to you. Firstly allow me to
express my sincere thanks to you for allowing me to be on you and
indeed for giving me thousands of cyber friends. Further thanks for
allowing me to keep in touch
with my loved ones.But i have a few observations to make,
1. When a man updates
their status they'll get 2 likes and 3 comments from their former
classmates and 0
friend requests..but if the same status is updated by a lady, they get
170 likes,350
comments and 470 friend requests...
why are you tolerating
Gender Discrimination?

2. People who dont even have license in real life have cars on fb...
why do you allow black
mailing?

3. People who are kept and not working in real life are CEOs on
fb...why do you allow scams?

4. Everyone writes prayers on fb but in real life they never have time
to kneel down and pray...why dont you remind them that you
are not God?

5. Everyone on fb likes to see a status pronouncing blessings on them
but they never bless others in real
life...cant you stop that
selfishness?

6. If facebook is about
meeting and making
new friends,why do you block me when i try doing so? Must i know everyone?

Please look into these
issues, before i foget, we need dislike button to dislike some nonsense status.
yours concerned addict
Apkors....

  • Date: Mar 11, 2013

pastor Akpors was caught by his
church members in a bar drinking
a bottle of chilled star *beer*.
So,
the members asked:
Member: Haabaa! Pastor Akpors you
should be drinking malt, fanta or
coke not star that is a beer. Your
not doing τђε word you preach o.

Pastor Akpors: shatttap jooo, where was
malt, fanta and coke when STAR
led the 3 wise men to Jesus?

  • Date: Mar 12, 2013

lolz akpors dome suffer, make uba use anoda name na

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